No one told me

Change. Change. Change. Hear it echoing? I hear it. Loud and clear like screams deafening anyone who’s found out the truth.

Claiming that it’s good for you; that it’s normal to happen to every soul as part of the tedious chore of growing up, mature and older. The very thing supposed to be normal somehow manages to strike a flame of fear in my heart. What happens when the people you grew close and attached to, simply change?

I’m still the same person I was wrapped up inside this frail cellophane body releasing screams of escape. The shivers continue to overtake me; I’m still as cold and dark as I was. I never let the fire burn within me for too long, I knew it was never enough to be worth melting for. Can the same be said about you?

I hear the profanities leaving your empty mind when the world around you applauds you for your vulgar language. You aren’t the person I once knew, ever though you claim under all those bricked-up layers the being I once met remains. That being has been smashed and left to burn in the fire of insecurities inside you, leaving the afterglow. Yes, it remains. As a pile of ash.

I know you’re getting lonely surrounded by a crowd who claim that you are to stay together till the end; little do they know the tears you once shed fell in their names. I want to save you. Jump right in and be the hero, even though the odds are most definitely not in my favour. Forgive me and spare my life, I’m not that brave as to throw it all away for you. You would throw it away for me, right?

How hypocritical of me I seem to sound selfish, so did you when your heart burned red with desire. I wished, oh how I wished we could be as close as the two fingers on my right, now I know we are as close as night and day. Stopping for a moment of intermission in sunlight; blinding with beauty, but carrying the night upon its shoulders. The darkness will follow me wherever I go, because the darkness wouldn’t leave whenever it felt the need to.

You were too good to be true, I can no longer hear your cries. You’ve fallen too far behind the brick wall you once managed to clamber over. No one told me growing older was going to be this lonely. No one mentions the coldness growing in your heart, the blood oozing out of every wound and the making of an empty ice heart.

– Strikedbyepicness


New beginnings

Throw the beginning, the start, the origin at me this time,
and watch me blossom like a marigold in the sunshine.
Striding through those iron-plated gates,
watching as words in these fading walls decide our fates.
Reveal your shadow from under the willow tree,
and plunge it into a world where it can be free.

Dressed for success with a smile on my face,
I am the first to cross that line in the race.
‘What race?’ I hear you cry.
Why the race to demonstrate how hard we try.
Try to defeat those demons inside,
showing that they are not worth the hours I’ve cried.
Recovering all the happiness that has died.
The danger is the same in every book on these dusty shelves,
if others wreck us, or we wreck

Starting the day with not knowing what the dawn has in store,
we venture through life, finding the reason we are living for.
Companionship is all that I require of those people rushing past,
to find others who would make those memories last.

Today we tip-toe closer to unveiling what is written,
healing the scars of what has already bitten.
The poison has already wounded the brain,
but by losing we have everything left to gain.
The past has left us and tucked us away,
so learn its lessons and direct your own way.

Head high, shoulders back,
defending against what life has got to attack.
Morphing into the person we wished we could be,
this is the time I can finally represent me.
Hoping that others will accept who I am,
I will no longer fall for my own selfless scam.
This is me now I have changed my whole perception,
I am now an accurate reflection,
of my personality without deception.

So to the new beginnings waiting for me at the other side,
I welcome them and take it upon my stride.
For, without the turning over of that new leaf,
we would be stuck not knowing what lies for us underneath.



The scythe

Drifting. Drifting through life with a scythe in my hand, no one but me can see. The people walk into the scythe in my hand and straight back out alive. The scythe it remains right by my side while the whole world seems to hide away terrified. Crashing. Crashing through life with a scythe in my hand playing with the game of life. The scythe it cuts thee like cupid’s dark arrow impaling the heart.

Tripping. Tripping through life with a scythe above my head, closer and closer, yet further and further away. It stalks me, it taunts me right above my head following my footsteps fumbling away at what is to be done. Crumbling. Crumbling through life with a scythe above my head looking up at the clouds and six feet under the ground. Laughing at my every move, it inches closer when it has the chance. Its midnight eyes are watching me.

Tumbling. Tumbling through life with a scythe around my neck with promises of salvation engraved on the handle. They may be blind to it, but their conscious reeks with realisation. They drag, they wrench, they heave the scythe from around my neck, but it won’t go. It’s permanant. Leave the scythe around my neck for only I can detach its hold. Limping. Limping through life with a scythe around my neck visible for the whole world to see. It remains there staring impatiently at the clock ticking away to our dusty deaths. Gone.



Holding back

What’s the one thing holding you back from doing whatever it is you want to do? Do you want to travel the world and experience different cultures and foods. (Who can not love food?) Do you want to show the world who you are and make yourself known to everyone? Do you want to take care of people or animals? Do you want to run your own business or restaurant? So why can’t you go out there and do it? Why can’t you make your dreams a reality?

You know why? Because the only thing holding you back is yourself. Sometimes we become so afraid of doing what we want to do for once, that we never end up doing it. We care to much about what other people think of us and don’t listen to ourselves.

Our heart’s telling us to believe and stay strong and one day, one day we will be away from this all. But our mind is telling us, constantly reminding us that we will never be away from this torture of reality. If we believe, if we truly believe, then one day everything will turn out how you wished it would. To get there, the only thing we need to change is ourselves, and the rest will fall into place.

Wadz x

Beautiful words

You know what the great thing about blogging is? You can’t see a person. They might think that they are the worst-looking person in the world, but when they sit and type about the things that interest them, their words are beautiful. They are able to see beyond their imperfections and finally start to see the good in the world because other people are reading their words, and not judging based on looks. They read, enjoy, comment and share with others. They converse with others and finally start to become loved and actually feel like they are worth something.

People will appreciate them and appreciate what they do. Love them and love what they do, even though they have not seen them. Care about them and care about what they do, because as soon as you type that post, you are putting a piece of yourself on the internet. People will either take advantage of that, or will value it. If they value it, you carry on writing about whatever interests you. If they take advantage of it, you ignore them and carry on doing what you love.

They power of writing is that you are able to either change the world with it, or destroy everything. It’s your choice to make and your decision will be vital to you and to everyone who cares about you.

Words are so powerful and you can even fall completely in love with someone’s words so much so that you don’t care about what they look like, you like them for the person they are inside all of that skin. I mean, who are we to define beautiful or handsome or even ‘normal‘. What is normal? Normal is whatever you think of it to be.

“Normal is just an illusion, what’s normal to the spider is chaos for the fly.” ~ Charles Addams

This post had no structure or form whatsoever. I love it.


Good ol’ haters

Hello everyone!

I’ve been gone for so long and so much has happened. TOO MUCH TO EXPLAIN TOO MUCH!! 😄Aaaaaaaaaaahh But it is exciting too much, not like bad too much. Anyway I hope all of you are doing well and that your day was just like you hoped it would be, maybe even better.

The topic I wanted to talk to you about today is the bad people out there. The bad people who seem to feed off people’s sorrow and unhappiness. The bad people who don’t seem to find any joy in the World, but are always plotting in their head of another victim. The bad people who will not let you rest until you have paid, dearly. The bad people who would do anything for the cause of your destruction, just for the reason that they find contentment in your grief. The people that your parents warn you about when you’re young. The people who seem to roam the streets at night, with nothing better to do than engulf the darkness.

Just kidding. I’m gonna be talking all those lovely haters. Those wonderful people who sometimes hide behind their screens and think that they can say anything to anyone, when they really can’t. They still do though, and until we are wiped off the face of this earth, they will not be gone.

They can be people face-to-face like bullies. And one reason that everyone says, that I don’t particularly agree with, is that they are the ones who are insecure with themselves so they want to take it out on other people. Firstly they bully others because they think that they are better then them. It is to do with pride, not necessarily to do with insecurities. That statement almost makes you feel sorry for the bullies. The amount of mental and physical damage they do to a person is actually unimaginable. They can lead the person to have a lot of mental health problems in the future, self-harming and can even lead to suicide.

So based on that, here are just some ways we can stop them people from bothering us and interrupting what we enjoy.

Number 1. Don’t hate on other people. If you hate on someone else you will just get yourself into a fight and people will start judging you for it too. Even if you do it on a fake or secret account, it will not only affect the person you are saying it to, it will affect you too.

Numbero 2. Don’t let them get you down. You are amazing and unique and sometimes it can be as small as a nasty comment from someone that can stop you doing what you love, forever. Always look towards the light. Look at the good things about what you do and just think of this as a minor obstacle on the road that will only make you stronger.

Numéro 3. Do not blame yourself. It is not you who is at fault, it is them. They are the ones who are nasty to you and they just don’t want you to do the best that you can in your life.

Número 4. Take it as a compliment! They are jealous of your success and want to take it away from you. Don’t let yourself sink onto the same level as them, you are worth so so so much more.

Numerus 5. Take it on the chin and move along. If they are actually offering some good advice for once, listen to what they are saying and improve yourself. You’re not perfect, neither is anyone else. We all need to improve and what better way than using the advice of the people who actually mean to get a reaction out of us.

Nummer 6. If you are a hater who actually means well, then what better time to improve than now. Go out there and show everyone that you actually mean well and go get to the peak of where you can be. #YOLO Make sure your life is worth living.

That is my weird but somewhat helpful steps on how to deal with the haterzzz. (See I cannot even be bothered with them. I fall asleep zzz).

“What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life?” ~ Lynette Mather

Until the next time I can be bothered to write SO much,

Wadz x 😛

I’m back!! and the Liebster Award

liebster award

Hey everyone! I’m back! I’ve had a great like week or so off where I just had the time to think about everything. I am now going to be more active and write more shorter posts.

This post is going to be the Liebster Award that I got nominated by the wonderful Supergirl2000. (She is amazing go and check out her blog!)

Here are the rules:

  • Thank your nominator (put link to their blog in your post).
  • Share the award on your blog.
  • Share 11 random facts about yourself.
  • Answer 10 (or 11) questions asked to you.
  • Ask 10 questions to 10 new nominees
  • Notify them via social media.

I will answer the questions that I got asked first, then I will go onto anything else.

  1. Why did you start blogging? I started blogging to share all my thoughts with people who I had never met before. I also wanted to be the real me that I had been hiding inside for far too long.
  2. Your favourite way to relax? My favourite way to relax is listen to music, watch T.V or films or just sit down and think.
  3. Are you a motivated person or a procrastinator? Ha ha out of all the questions in the world. I am a procrastinator. I constantly get distracted and have lost all motivation to succeed. What am I doing with my life?
  4. Something that scared you but you overcame it and did it anyway? Talk to people or do a class presentation. It is like hell. But for some reason we always have to get up and talk to everyone. If it was my own choice I would never do it. But I was always forced and did it anyway. I was shaking the whole way.
  5. Any quote you try to live by? I don’t have a specific quote that I like to live by, I like all quotes. They all make you feel and think in a different way. But here’s one that I love. I liked so much, I painted it on the wall right above my bed. 

    Life asked Death, “Why do people love me, but hate you?” Death replied, “Because you are a beautiful lie and I’m a painful Truth.”


  6. Organized or messy? I am very messy in that whenever I pick something up I always leave it in random places and the whole room just turns into a dump. I am also pretty organsed in how I lay things out on paper and I make a lot of lists.
  7. Have you ever fasted? if yes, how was the experience? I have fasted. It was actually alright. I’m not usually hungry, so it wasn’t extremely hard.
  8. Do you follow politics? I do not follow politics. I would probably get mad and start screaming at them. I get really annoyed when they make comments that will set me off or they don’t know what they’re talking about. I guess I’m going to have to get used to it if I want to change the world.
  9. Something you’re passionate about? Hmmm… I don’t really know to be honest. I’m quite passionate when it comes to standing up for what I believe in. Whether it may be feminism, human rights, stereotypes, society, the way that teenagers are all viewed to be dark and moody, etc. There are a lot of things.
  10. Last one! How would you describe “love”? I would describe love as being a situation where you both feel like a somebody. You both feel special and happy and you feel like you can defeat anything that may come in your way. Meh. How would I know? I’m single like a Pringle that doesn’t want to mingle.


Yeahh! I completed my first ever batch of questions on myself! That was hard. Here comes the even tougher ones. 11 random facts about me. I’m going to be here for a while.

  1. I am a 15 year old girl, born in December and lives in England.
  2. I have brown eyes, jet black hair and a dimple on my left cheek.
  3. Some of the movies that I really like are Big Hero 6 and My neighbour Totoro. (They are amazing and so creative that they take you to another world).
  4. My favourite TV series was Merlin and when it ended I cried. I don’t usually cry at things, but I cried.
  5. My favourite colours are black, red and green (but they keep changing).
  6. I have never broken a bone, but I cracked my head when I was like 5.
  7. I am addicted to caffeine.
  8. I don’t wear make-up. With the exception of eyeliner of course.
  9. I want to get an industrial piercing, a helix piercing, an eyebrow piercing and a lip piercing.
  10. My personality type is INFJ (Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging)
  11. I am the middle child in my family. (Brother, Sister, ME, Brother, Sister). I just come in and ruin the pattern.


Here are the people that I nominate:


Here are the questions that I want you to answer:

  1. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?
  2. Summer or winter?
  3. What genre of music do you most prefer?
  4. What is something that you have done and are proud of?
  5. What is your favourite animal/ creature/ insect?
  6. What is one thing that you are afraid of?
  7. What is the best book/ novel/ magazine/ comic that you have ever read?
  8. What is your favourite thing about yourself?
  9. If you were given any superpower, what would you choose?
  10. If you had to change one thing about the world, what would you change?
  11. What are your aims for the future?


Thank you so much for reading this. If I haven’t nominated you and you want to do this challenge, go ahead and do it! I will look forward to writing shorter more frequent posts. There will be that odd one that will be long, but that’s it. But for now, that’s me done. Until the next time.

Wadz x




Quote challenge #day3

Hey everyone! So today is my last day of the quote challenge. I’m kind of relieved that I have completed my first challenge as a blogger, and I’m kind of sad that I won’t be doing this any more. I might do these type of posts in the future, who knows?

The challenge is:

  1. Post in three consecutive days.
  2. You can pick one or three quotes per day.
  3. Challenge three different bloggers per day.


Today’s quote is:

“Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn’t have the time to sit around and talk about you. What’s important to me is not others’ opinions of me, but what’s important to me is my opinion of myself.” ~ C. JoyBell C.


I  have chosen this quote to end on because it is a really important thing that we will come across in our day-to-day lives. This ‘important‘ thing is people. People will be kind, they will be nasty, they might love you and they might hate you. That is just the way it works. Not everyone is going to like everyone. You might not like a person’s personality or the way they treat other people and you don’t have to. No one can force you to.

Just because a person is popular or ‘cool,’ does not mean that you have to like them. You don’t. You don’t have to be mean to them or give them dirty looks every time they walk past, you just have to be civil. Say hi and smile at them. Give them a little wave. It could be the start of something new and you realise that this person is not what they seem. They could be a completely different person inside.

If someone does not like you, do not waste your precious time worrying or contemplating on everything that is wrong with you, go out and adventure. Adventure through the world. Go on a journey to find the real you. Benefit someone in some way. Change the world. Everyone has the power the change the world, most people are just too afraid to use it. Be fearless and don’t let anyone stand in your way.

The last thing I want to touch upon is how we value ourselves and how we look at ourselves. Everyone has imperfections and no one is perfect. The sooner you accept these imperfections, the sooner you will be much happier. You will realise that them things weren’t really imperfections, they are what make you, you. They make you the wonderful, unique person that you are, and no one can replicate that. Even if someone tries so hard to be like someone they will never exactly be like them. Imagine how boring the world would be if everyone was the same? Everyone would act the same and look the same. They would all have the same personality and the same way of thinking. I for one am glad the world is not the same, everyone deserves to be their own person.

Don’t let anyone put you down. Don’t let anyone add another something to your pain. You have the ability to do well, don’t let anyone take that away from you. Because in the end “we all die. The goal isn’t to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”

The last three nominees are:

  1. disdailydose
  2. emilycatstanley
  3. Nansfit


I look forward to doing these types of posts again soon. But for now it was fun doing this challenge and I’m ready for the next challenge that comes my way. Until the next time I can be bothered to write so much.

Wadz x

The good in the world

Hey guys! Sorry I haven’t been active for like a week. It’s just that my laptop stopped working and I had to get it repaired (which took like years). I couldn’t write a post or even a quote on my phone because it’s so old and rubbish. So yeah I haven’t been able to express myself or communicate with you awesome people for a week. 😦 To make up for that however I am going to give you guys a long-ish post because you always end up reading them, and I am utterly grateful for that. I still can’t believe people would actually take out 5 minutes of their time just to read my nonsense. Anyway here we go…

I have kind of realised I almost always talk about myself and how much I hate life and the world and all that. But I have never really talked about how good the world is. I know it may seem impossible to write a post on, but I’m sure under all the sufferings and horror and hardships and corruption, there must be some good in there. An example of this is a person. They be all mean and nasty and horrible on the outside, but when you dig beneath the crust, you realise that they are not as evil as they make out to be. The same with the world. Except it’s not easy to dig beneath the crust.

I’m going to start with a story of people who may seem horrible on the outside, but are the complete opposite inside and actually have a heart.

When burglars in San Bernardino County, California realized the computers they’d stolen were from a nonprofit that helps victims of sexual violence, they returned them along with an apology note. This note may just help restore your faith in humanity.


If that isn’t amazing, I don’t know what is.

To read the full story click here:


There may be wicked people out there who love to watch people suffer and enjoy inflicting pain upon others. But the amount of people who are wicked out there is also equal to the amount of nice and awesome people in the world. You just have to know where to look. You could be surrounding yourself with the wrong type of people who make you question what is wrong with the world, when all you have to do is look beyond your comfort zone and you will find someone, even if it is just one person, who will accept you with who you are. They will make you feel like the world is an amazing place to be and that you are the best person that has ever existed.

Another thing is that we can use our lives to do whatever we want to do. That’s right you can do whatever you desire, because newsflash it’s your life and no one can control it. There are some people who will certainly try to control it, but to those people you turn your face and walk the other way. Them people completely don’t matter and they never will. They are the type of people who will not ask for you, if you are not there. They will leave you in your hour of need. Them people need to get their act together because if you are not there for anyone else, how are people going to be there for you when you desperately need it?

You can be inspired and inspire others. People learn from each other, make new friends and put their trust in people they never thought of. You can do things in your life that will be remembered and that people will look towards and learn from. They will be inspired by your work and the things that you have done. You have been given this one life which you can never get back. Make sure at the end of the day, you turn around and smile at how far you have come and how well you have spent your time.

I think that is the end of my post about the good in the world. If I find some other things that are good with the world, then I can make a second post about this. This can also help me to improve my pessimist mind into a more optimistic one. Some good can come out of this post at least.

Thank you for taking the time out to read my post and feel free as always to comment on what you thought. This post was a bit different, but it was good different. I look forward to writing more posts like these. If you have any more ‘good things about the world’ please let me know them as well. And I think that is just about it.

Until the next time I can be bothered to write and think so much.

Wadz x


“Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.” ~ Desmond Tutu 


-J. B. Priestley

“But just remember this. One Eva Smith has gone – but there are millions and millions and millions of Eva Smiths and John Smiths still left with us, with their lives, their hopes and fears, their suffering and chance of happiness, all intertwined with our lives, and what we think and say and do. We don’t live alone. We are members of one body. We are responsible for each other. And I tell you that the time will soon come when, if men will not learn that lesson, then they well be taught it in fire and bloody and anguish. Good night.”

~An Inspector Calls – J. B. Priestley